Filmmaking

I have always wanted to be a filmmaker

You see I love good stories be it read, watched or told. I am quite a reader but there is something about watching movies that give you a different level of experience. The moving pictures are able to vividly capture moments – moment of happiness, moment of love, moment of grief, moment of peace - so that when a perfect moment happens to you, you recognize it and not just pass you by.

This fascination with films leads me to aspire to pursue filmmaking. When I was in high school, I dabbled in directing school plays and the work gives me such a wonderful feeling of satisfaction. I thought that when I finally join the adult world, this is how work should feel like. By college, it was a choice between UP’s Film and Audio Visual Program and Ateneo’s College of Communication major in Film. At the urging of my folks, I chose the latter even if radical UP was more my taste. I ended up at the Jesuit school and like most kids my age back then, I flunked first year, missing the required point average by .02%. Story of my life. I ended op in a business school and finished ok. I worked in various firms doing sales, traveled a bit, made new friends and lost some old ones, have her heart broken, learned to heal, live the daily grind, learned a few things about growing up, got drunk a lot too. But at the back of my head I know I will pursue what I really want sooner or later.

Now, I have decided this is the perfect time to continue what I have started, to study film and work in the industry. I might have a few set back in the past but I know everything happens for a reason. I have to experience failure, love, waiting, finding, losing, death, laughter, friendship, wasted, rapture, spirituality, so that I could give this feeling of experience to people through my work. Showing them the intricate details of life as I have seen it. I have to meet the people that touched my life or broke my heart or just plain passed me by because only then could I make my characters real. I have to meet the teachers that came my way so that they can teach me bits of wisdom that answered some of the questions in my head, further affirming there is so much more to learn.

Why IAFT

Last December, I passed by Big Foot’s booth in Glorietta and was excited to learn that there is a film school in the country. I talked to the guy behind the booth for a good thirty minutes, asking questions, seeing myself doing the program sometime soon. He was nice enough to give me a black shirt with the International Academy of Film and Television logo on it. I have to give it away for Christmas though because it was two sizes smaller than mine. I told you, story of my life.

IAFT is my choice because it is the only film school in the country that offers a global outlook in their program. I firmly believe that we are in the age and time when one cannot not just look at the bigger picture. With the state of the art equipment being used in the school, I am able to learn the latest in technology and use it in my work. Having mentors from all over the world greatly helps me see the big picture by learning their craft and hearing their wisdom. Living in a different city promises new experiences and growing pains that I could share in my stories. And above all I am working with people with the same passion as I have, and perhaps a few who shares the same vision as mine, and together we could bring our vision to the world.

On film, ego, and creation

I now realize that making a film is not a one-man team. Instead, it’s a collaboration of various artists putting their vision and talent with the goal of making one great film. I used to think that being a director is a tough job because you are doing most of the work. I arrived at this conclusion mostly from my experience directing plays in high school. This is really where I was leaning when I was younger – to direct, to be at the center of things, to see my vision come to life. But the past eight years seem to have changed this perception. The journey that has brought me where I am now was indeed a humbling experience. I no longer see film making, or whatever I do for that matter, as a way for me to prove my greatness to the world. But rather to share to the world the few things life has thought me, and in the process learn some more.

Don't get me wrong; I still believe that ego is important for any creation. Only by putting a part of ourselves in something do we create something meaningful for us and then, for others. But it should not be the bottom line. Rather it’s realizing that even as a screenwriter, an editor, a line producer, a caster, a sound designer, it’s your movie. And a good director must always strive to make everyone put their selves – their ego- in their work. Because unlike in a painting or a book, a movie is a creation of many artists.

Hence my dilemma, I’ve been wondering for a while whether to be on the writing part, the sound side or editing part of filmmaking. My affinity to all is the same. I have a long love affair with the written word. I have a journal since I was ten and as mentioned, have a great passion for stories. But also, eighty percent of my life is music and believes that it is the psychological backbone in any film. Doing editing is also something that I enjoy. I love playing with colors and images. Though my experience on that is basic Photoshop, the fact that I could sit in front of my PC editing images for twelve straight hours must be something.

IAFT’s one-year immersion program, because it touches all side of film making, answers my dilemma. I figure after a year of learning everything from my mentors, I would know my niche in this industry. Who knows, I might even end up directing after all. Or something far flung from my original intention - distributing film perhaps. If there’s one thing experience has thought me, it’s that: everything is all about experience. And I plan to enjoy this ride and be prepared for whatever life has in store for me.

I am excited to start my first term this August. I can’t wait to meet new people and learn. I’m once again this high school kid hungry for knowledge, but this time with ample experiences to boot and knowing that it does not come without hard work and a clear head.